I have gotten a lot of interesting responses to my decision to keep my last name upon matrimony. My father wishes I would have taken my husbands last name even though I am the last generation left with our last name of Rose. Many women my mother’s age think its cool and appropriate I kept my name. And then I have met those people who think it’ll be just a little time before I take my husband’s name or hyphenate it before having children.

I come from a long tradition of women keeping their last names. My mother and Aunt kept theirs and a lot of my mother’s friends reclaimed their last names after divorces or even reincorporated them into their married names while they were still with their husbands. Yet, I still have women in my life who question my thinking.

This is something I think about a lot as other friends of mine are becoming married and making decisions about changing the names they were given upon birth.

An article from yesterday’s NYTimes discusses different approaches couples are implementing to decide how to proceed with the name changes. One couple played a game of softball between families. The couple took the winning family’s name. Other couples chose a whole new name for both of them.

One aspect that often gets left out of this discussion is the emotional toll this choice takes on one’s identity. How does it feel to change one’s name? It’s a feeling I don’t know. I’ve heard women give into changing their names when they haven’t wanted to because their husband to be thought it was proper. The decision to change one’s name shouldn’t be taken lightly and it should also be seen as a gender issue given that women are the ones that are expected to change their name or at least consider the option.

Additionally, this article also brought up the point that many women who are only children don’t want to change their name. I am an only child but did not consider how that affected my decision.

Ultimately, I was always certain of my decision to keep my last name when I was a young woman. However, I am interested by the idea that this decision must be pondered at all.